Marriage often seems like a dream, unless you’ve been married. Sometimes, ‘forever’ takes a little detour and before you know it, it’s time to start over. Divorce is that winding road where feelings are raw and everything you once knew seems topsy curly. But, it’s not all shadows and tears. It’s more akin to how you skipped stones across a lake – you might have to try more than once to get it right.
Consider Sarah. She divorced a few years ago and felt like she was floating in a storm. She used to jokingly complain about snoring that was loud enough to wake the neighbors, and now even that humor had disappeared. Her story is not unique; many find themselves standing at the edge of a similar cliff. Stepping into this is kind of like walking into an overcrowded closet- overwhelming, bewildering and tight.
Dealing with the legal and emotional aspects of things? Piece it together from a flat-pack where the instructions are missing a page or two. You will get there in the end, but not without a couple of headaches. Lawyers and therapeutic friends become essential stops when it feels like you’re on a journey with no final destination.
But emotionally is like being on a ride without a safety bar. One moment you’re picturing a sunny tomorrow, and the next you’re drowning in those memories, screaming into a pillow after nostalgia decided to make a visit. Your emotional trail includes shifts from sorrow, to relief, to anger. Laughter becomes your safety net, showing up in the most unlikely scenarios to remind you life’s not all high drama or slapstick comedies, but a mix of both.
Got kids? It’s a whole new enchilada. Their feelings add an extra layer of complication. Explaining that mom and dad won’t be living under the same roof anymore is dicey. It’s like trying to navigate around eggshells to manage delicate emotions while keeping a cool facade.
They claim Time is always a healer, but I’d argue it’s more of a bandaid than a cure. Healing takes a course of its own, a dance between steps forward, backward and sideways. There comes a day when moving forward doesn’t feel as mucky as walking through sludge; at times you may even catch yourself dancing.
Ultimately, divorce is not the end but a detour. It’s about taking shattered pieces and creating something new – not a perfect puzzle but a wild mosaic. Messy? Definitely. But chaos often births its own sort of spectacle. You just need another in